Someday

I just finished another really great book.

"Same Kind of Different As Me" by Ron Hall & Denver Moore.

Read it.

It's about an unlikely friendship between a dangerous homeless drifter and an upscale art dealer. It was focused on the restorative power of forgiveness and unconditional love.

I don't know what my deal has been lately, but I've been gravitating towards a lot of books about faith and love. My best guess is that I know the definition of faith, but I don't understand it. At all. And I'm not singling out religion here, rather I don't see how everyone around me can put faith, blind faith into virtually anything or anyone. Without hesitation, I might add. Call me a cynic, but it's just not comprehensible to my brain.

However, when reading this book I came across something I'd like to share:

"...Christianity is not a religion; it's a relationship." "...which is why I know that when my faith was shattered and I raged against Him, He still accepted me. And even though I have penciled a black mark in His column, I can be honest about it. That's what a relationship is all about."

I've heard plenty of times about the relationship people think they have with god, and I'm always quick to dismiss it as delusion or something like it. And that's not fair, but I never fully realized just how unfair I was really being until I read that above passage. A lightbulb went off, and I realized that my problem isn't with god, it's with people and the bible. How is it possible that I can feel more comfortable putting blind faith into an unknown superior being hanging out in the sky but not the "holy text" I can physically hold in my hand?

Answer? People.

I tend to expect the ugly to come out in most people, because it usually does. The human race is why I can't put any belief in faith. That's not to say that I don't wish I could, because I do. I do want that. I've been reading all of these books lately like a maniac on a mission, and this was the first one to propel me one giant step forward. Maybe I just need to put out more love, and the faith will come.

Faith in myself. Faith in another person, idea, philosophy. Faith in the unknown.